i've made a lot of mistakes....

i've got a CD in my computer that i am listening to on repeat... it's beautiful. i love marking time with music.

i have a very sore throat... raw raw raw...

hand knit alpaca scarf around neck.

i got an email from alex, the artist who's work i adore so much, who i went on a magical mystical journey with last week.... or the week before? we talk about how we love the kodak beach in southbank. i like doing that a lot.

too much drinking again, my tolerance is actually growing. i drank spirits for hours last night, and i have No hangover. none. i did drink water and eat chips. i feel like i am going through a second undergraduate degree. only, this time, with the drinking and stupidity and fun and silliness. i want to do this too. i am loving it. seriously.

i still have the most profound sadness when i think of L. so much so that i feel like i'll cry like my heart is breaking. just because. there is so much there. my heart is very full of him. i love him very much. but. i don't regret that we aren't together, i feel like... he'll grow more now, and i will, and yeah. it's good. just really, really sad.

i'm spending time with friends. a lot. as much as possible, actually. it's good.
i'm trying to fill my life with them for a bit, because a. i love them, and b. i feel better when i am with them.

i lent a book to someone i barely know. this is a Big Deal for me. i feel like making friends with some more strangers soon.