a cardigan and a frown

it's raining again and it is Beautiful.

......

silk shawl progresses merrily. i intend devoting some kniting time to it asap.

.....

new knitty is out today, and i am tremendously excited. lots of divine knitting in there. prrrreeeaty.

.....

i feel uncomfortable with this keyboard. the keys don't give as well as mine on fishyfishyfishy do, or on richards, or even the work. it's sort of soft and pillow-y, but in a deeply irritating way.

.....

i played the fun game of 'is she a hooker' last night while walking home. is it just me, or is brisbane experiencing a revamp (hahaha) of the hooker fashion lately? i find it kind of offensive and stupid. why do people want to emulate prostitutes? i mean, the chick might have honestly found her white knee high boots and skirt shorter than jacket look attractive, but i hardely thing prostitutes dress like that because they want to. they are advertising. as that girl also was. i am biased because i hate heels, due to their impractical and harmful nature. same as i hate cosmetics. i think there is a space for women to be held responsible for their actions. yes, we act within patriarchy. but a middle class wealthy white woman has a Much larger space for choice than almost any other woman on earth. playing with the conventions of prostitution for fun isn't performative. it's possibly offensive. and stupid.

*shrugs*

i dunno though.
i don't like that way of dressing, so i can't really understand the perspective of someone who does. i am not sure she was particularly reflective on the politics of dressing how she did, but i can't be sure of that. they are not politics i necessarily agree with. and white boots? impractical! very very impractical.

......

another line of thought i have been entertaining of late is the role of hyperfeminitity in gay male culture. i've often found myself frustrated and confused by the rad fem stance on a lot of things in gay male culture, but on reading yet another streetpress marketed as queer, only to find the only women in the magazine to be straight and hyperfeminine, i am sort of reevaluating this.

i have a lot of time to think while - reformatting images for websites - cleaning cinemas - closing and opening cinema doors - shelving books - reformatting more images.

oh, and walking home. i tend to find having little mental debates with myself distracts me from thinking about the serial rapist in brisbane's inner north at the moment. dum de dum.

i've never seen you so awful; i found you at the bottom of a russian novel

.........

today is a less-bad day.

somehow, the cat is wet. i felt his tail up against my leg. this is confusing because we live in an apartment, and the cat can't get onto the varanda. strange.

my feet hurt.

.........

i found something repulsive.

terry and lees jeans making porn-o babies.

we have had his repulsive book at work, 'terryworld'.

aparently, pedophilia is cool or something? coooool. that is going to make me buy jeans? god, it's sick. call me a prude, but child pornography in No way is going to convince me to get a pair of jeans.

..........

lachlan is here. we are singing a song that goes alone the lines of 'oh no little toe.' this is because my toes are cold.

..........

i plastic wrapped heaps of books today. plastic wrapping books gives me a profound sense of satisfaction.

littleknits has some phenomenal new sea silk colours that i am looking at. the plan is that at each $500 increment i get down on my debt, i can get a present. when i am down to $1000 debt, i can get some yarn.

pretty yarn. halloween yarn. i feel deeply sad that i cannot do the spooky SP because of poorness.

22 years old and a woman now you're told

.....

soup for dinner.

i voted today.

the satanic verses is actually excellent for reading in fragments.

i want to make another shawl.

my new life as a coffee swiller is beginning with the help of Short Blacks with Water.

.....

cleaning out a popcorn machine makes the smell of popcorn oil infuse your skin, and the salt from the flavoraid (TM) permeate your skin. your fingers dry out and feel like husks.

portside --- emporium X emporium in terms of ritzyness.

i feel angry at workplace 1 for no good reason. workplace 3 is my favourite at the moment, and two, i am indifferent to, but pleased that it's there.

there is a lightheadedness associated with lying down sometimes. when you are tired? or not tired? have i eaten since breakfast? i have soup, yes. but no bread. i am suppose to watch my mood for anxiety associated with eating. that's why i read while i eat, apparently. i refuse to sound like a victim. that's not true, because i think i often do.

it's so much easier to wallow in victim - hood than to actually deal with the consequences and reality of your situation.

......

this isn't some sort of pity-plea. i just feel like venting like a teenager with a live journal whose only friends are. A. the minister's daughter she is in love with. B. her best friend, a good christian boy, who is dating the minister's daughter and C. her imaginary friend. or internet boyfriend in his late 20's. or imaginary friend. i have so many diary entries detailing my terror at this constructed linguistic sophistication. for god's sake, i am small and scared. for god's sake. i am a stupid, immature child. my words are complex and my reading list is profound, but i am a little girl who doesn't know who she is anymore. i can never be as beautiful as you think i am, because behind these velvety languid language curtains and ornate, gothic twisted arches made of metal and intellectual vigour, i sleep with a teddy bear and cry myself to sleep with a razor blade. i made a shit princess. the crown is too big, my hair is ugly and i am shit at brushing it, i only wear boots with scuffs and white paint on them, and i swear like a trouper. i'm blunt and small and confused.

and i'll find myself and run away and fuck everyone over in the end because i want to make you hate me as much as i hate myself sometimes.

i sort of feel like that, right now, because i am desperately overtired and cranky. i don't mean it.

venting away in the privacy of the internet.
as if it's private. ha.

well, it's faceless.

i ask. does anyone ever feel grown-up and in control? like a real adult?

.......


i think i am going to do a painting of a fish tonight.

i don't hate myself. therapy is a long process, and i missed my last session because i ran out of money.

pizza + beer + free = happyface

i think there is an art show on tonight at the alibi, so there will be free beer. the usual free pizza is soon to be with me. this delights me. free pizza is the ultimate in pizza. this also means i can save my can of soup for lunch tomorrow.

i think my blog is descending into a new realm of tedium.

you know you care about my soup. really. you do.

i'm in the stages of planning my next tattoo; also a fish. i am going to draw inspiration from The Fish Book Of Love - see www.librarything.com for more information on the Fish Book Of Joy. upper thigh this time, and realistic. fish are my friends. i am still waiting to meet lachlan's fish, Foo. my desire for a fish of my own is profound.

last night, we saw the exceedingly delightful Jack London, who has the most intense, rich voice - it was like stepping into the world's happiest time capsule, into this beautiful 30 - years - ago - world of coffee deep voices and happy flittering guitar. apart from the crowd at the zoo, who were loud and irritating, cemented by the fact i had just finished work.

i was considering seeing erik griswald's percussion done by some brisbane percussionsts tonight, but, er... i am too poor, and i don't feel like travelling home from south bank by myself tonight. lachlan is at work? or just not at home. i dunno. somewhere in the aether. that, and the whole working at 8.30 until 4 at richards, then 6-10 at the dendy makes me feel seedy. saturday is less gross, just 10 - 5.30, sunday - off, pending christine's workload. monday, richard. tuesday is the killer - 8.30-11 richard. 11-2 IMA. 2-4 richard, 5.30 - 12.15 at the dendy. i feel sightly weak just thinking about it. then wednesday, 8.30-5.30 at the bookstore. thur, 8.30 - 12 at richards, 1 - 5.30 at the bookstore. dendy pending on that day.

i will pay off my credit card. i will pay off my credit card. this Never would have happened if i could have found one of the two extra jobs slightly earlier.

must work on article for lifted brow. with polishing, it is publishable. just need to change names and things.

i need something softer-core to read at the moment. as incredible as the satanic verses is, it is not quite -sitting on the bus- reading. or -catching a few minutes rest- reading. it's -forgetting the world as the words devour you- reading. perhaps i can carry around that fantasic, weird book of chinese short stories with me. or... mh. sock knitting? i have sock yarn. i have the power. i just need to make the leap.

there is a boy and he never goes out....

i now can responsibly serve alcohol, and am getting a little certificate to prove it. i love certificates. but, that is 4 hours of my life i am not getting back. blerg.

and, i have a pool in my kitchen! Oh Joy. it seems that there is something wrong with the tap, plumbing, something, and the floor is soaked. so much so i am avoiding the area. and, as usual, like when the garbage disposal unit fucked up, the landlord is being Quiet.

ah well. at least it keeps the cat out of the kitchen.

more casiotone celebration today. most days are casiotone celebration days around here. hurah! *skipping around with casitone-ish music playing in the background* twinkle echo is my prefered CD, as much as i do enjoy ettiquette. i am starting to develope an intimate relationship with 'thunderbear', a band/person/musician which is this divine, rolling piano sounds, going on and on like a glorious mountain or river or some magestic shit like that....

maybe i will see a band tonight. that will be fun! although i will smell like popcorn. And, it will be freeeee! yeees! i like free-ness. and, they sound like something i would enjoy.

sea silk shawl X2 is going nicely. with lifeline. big, ugly, Clear lifeline.

tomorrow is payday. money. happy. food. very happy. today, i have corn crakers. and a museli bar. and an old tangerine. and, erm... nope, i finished the spinage. fun.

nothing remarkable to leave behind

i wish i had some sort of music-playing devise to take with me to work.

ok. no ben thompson. lazy. sleeping. he was at the folk night thing - i really liked him. bler! i wish i had gone.
but, seriously, i will return to my Lazy Sundays At the Powerhouse Gigs, because they are both free and good. and excellent for knitting time. well lit! well lit live music! oh jollification.

i feel melancholy and sober today. this is for multiple reasons. one of which being that i have to work at richards until 4, then go to southbank and do my RSA course (responsible service of alcomahol) from 5 - 9. this leaves no time for lunch, or dinner. this makes me feel deeply frustrated, because, well, eating is my Friend. eating is good. yuuum yuuum. on the same general theme, having enough money to purchase food is also good, and i am down to the last $10 of the payweek. this is a melancholy and sober moment for all.

all day mon. at the theatre was an adventure, as they forgot to roster on someone who was trained with me. i saw a Hell Customer from the bookstore, always exciting to see them in another context and being less impolite. still impolite though. i don't care How old or rich you are. there is NO excuse for rudeness to the poor people serving you books, movie tickets, and popcorn. ok? get that, rude cow lady?

eye on the prize, elizabeth. eye on the prize.

i think i need to go chat to the tibetan monk - divination - rinpoche. worth the money. worth the devotion to buddhism. worth it to work out how much bad karma i will be working off for fucking people over in this life. (seriously, there are only two people i have fucked over. one equally fucked me over, so we sort of even each other out, the other, well, i disproportionately fucked her over. i am not sure my monthy donations to the wilderness society, MSF, oxfam, amnesty, and the WSPA will wear off that. but it seems good. better than actually talking to her because she scares the beee-geesus out of me.... that, and there is an element of self-flagulation about it. if i work it out, i will feel better. i feel bad about feeling better. l. tells me to get over it, because he detests, due to her meanness towards me, and, well, he just doesn't like her. but, artghh. it's not about liking her. i don't like her either. its about me being a shit. and knowing there is nothing i can really do to fix it. yes. tibetan refugee will make me feel better. and, if he doesn't at least my $55 donation will help him out. **rolls eyes at my idiotic logic** and yes, damn it, i WILL blog about it, i am sick of censoring my rants on the off chance someone googles their way into my bloggity blog. who cares, elizabeth. stop being so goddamn neurotic.)

*sings the Neurotic Me song to self*

this new, exciting world of Not Having Days Off is making me feel slightly deranged and unrailed. poink.

rest in peace, steve irwin

it is a terribly sad day for conservation, as well as for the erwin family. as much as he was a showman, an ockar, The stereotype of australiana, those things are trivial compared to the incredible work he did in caring for the wildlife and native land in australia.

i'd say he was, perhaps, the most important conservationist in the world. he bought attention to the most reviled animals, and showed the world how exciting and wonderful they could be. he was so Alive.

i feel deeply shocked, and deeply saddened today. he was my childhood hero, long before i understood the importance of his work. and as much as i sniggered at the 'keep oooorstaaalia safe' ads, and the crikey's - that is besides the point. he raised awareness of the importance of conservation. he put his millions of dollars into purchasing land in australia to protect native, engangered species. he did so much amazing, incredible work, was a beautiful, intense, colourful character, an adoring father. he ... shone.

he died doing what he loved. that hardly makes it less sad. and now, as the grieving family are going to be circled like carrion by vultures, i hope to god a mockery won't be made of what matters here - respect for his family, and a continuance of his work.

you will be sadly, sadly missed, steve irwin.

freeganing and carrying boxed.

i got a wine crate from the wine emporium. there are few places better to store books than in old crates. old wooden lovely crates of happiness. i did just walk home carrying it. my arms hurt, with the satisfaction of Free Things.

i managed to give myself a paper cut with cardboard. how does that work?


comming up next month there are a series of events at the powerhouse - which is an Amazing arts centre in brisbane - featuring a group of tibetan monks in exile. i am really excited and looking forward to a week of daily guided meditation, three toned singing and traditional music. 19- 23, i think. very fun indeed.

in other news, father's day turns everyone into grotesque shopping monsters.

the aim was to see redbreast on thur. night at rics. this was halted, due to tiredness, and heaps and heaps of rain. happy, good, lovely rain, but also - not fun walking to rics in - rain.

i was considering going down to the powerhouse today to see ben thompson, but am debating if i can be bothered. i got free lunch, which is encouraging. i am lazy, and i have worked a lot, and am working tomorrow, and will have to walk home alone, which is discouraging.

so the argument rages. sit at home. my room is ugly and drab. walk down to see live music. this is fun and invigorating. i have to work all day tomorrow, i just want to sleep. sleeping will make me tired-er. and so on it rages. regardless, the Silk Shawl mark two will continue this afternoon. happy silk shawl. happy. soft goodness.

the note on the bed says 'true love is hard to find...'

i feel exhausted after two days of madness.

monday. 12 - 5.30 at bookstore. 7-12 at dendy.

tue. 10-2 at bookstore. 2-6 at sachs.

sad veritas. tired veritas. veritas filled with the futility of paying off credit card and affording food. 'this too will pass'

however, sunday was beautiful. i woke up and read the rest of 'dreams of speaking,' started on 'the satanic verses' and walked down to new farm park in the rain. just a beautiful amount of rain, making everything clear and crystaline. redbreast was playing in the spark bar, and their beautiful soft music made me deeply happy. i walked home with lachlan, had dinner, and went to bed. beautiful, beautiful day. not to mention the sheeps yoghurt smoothie i had for breakfast! delicious.

after a day of rest, i am feeling much better. i have one repeat left on the sea silk shawl, until it's done. the way it falls makes me profoundly pleased. it's heavy in such a soft, beautiful way.

it's still raining too. cold enough for jumpers. warm enough to have a singlet underneath. i've been 'the mind watching the mind' today, in order to try and stay off the internet. as we can see, this was not the case. i am, however, looking forward to reading more of 'satanic verses' tonight. rushdie is incredible. the insensity of his writing is dizzying and intoxicating; he uses words so thickly and densely that you can taste them.

there is an ad for berlei bras on daytime television that is one of the most offensive pieces of advertising i have Ever set eyes on. the woman is cavorting around, like her bright pink bra is giving her an orgasm. thank you day time television.

scrabble high score 409

librarything is my new best friend. i love it with a passion beyond understanding or words. catalogue! books! online! with pictures!!!! looking at other people's books! fun! book fun! yay! yes. this is now eating my time with delight and gooooodness.

shout-out to Bethania person using a Queensland Government pathology ISP!
wow! you spent half an HOUR reading my blog! seriously, i feel flattered. thank you. and all from searching for a zero issue comic. ::waves to random person:: 29 minutes and i don't even get a Note though? c'mon... that's mean! who are you, mysterious 29 minute person in brisbane? who are you?

i heart bloglines.



saw marlinchen on wednesday, who were even better than last time i saw then. lachlan took issue with the 'swirly' effect on the keyboard, but was mesmerised by jasmine and skye. i, lacking refined music tastes, and not minding a good bit of swishy sounds as much, was just delighted. saw the divine miss lauren, and the lovely jane (for about the third time this week - strange, because before that, i hadn't seen her in a Very Long Time).

i feel sad that sandra's work is going down at the IMA. i have a maternal fondness of it, due to the hours spent feeding thread through the hole in the wall. it Glows! it looks like light through the room. though i noticed that a lot of the glow is faded out of it.

in other gripping news, i realised that i have double booked my monday. i am working from 8.30 - 5.30 at the bookstore. then 7pm until 12 midnight at the cinema. eep. i will be a flattened veritas. a squished, sad, flattened veritas, who has to get up in the morning, work 10 - 2 at the bookstore, then 2.30 - 6.30 at the furniture place.

i am looking forward to paying off my credit card. uggg.

in knitting news, i have slowed on the shawl. actually, stopped mid-row a few days ago, and have left it next to the sewing machine, out of the cat's reach. tonight will be dedicated to shawl of happyness, and perhaps some time with black alpaca gloves.

listless intellectual

this here is the sea silk shawl in action. part of the way through it... it's getting there. i don't think i have enough yarn to make it big and long though. despite mother insulting it on that basis, i still Love My Shawl Deeeeply. My shawl friend. Mine.






this is a segment of the book orgie.
:satisfied smile:

a week of Doing Things

where to start ....

casiotone for the painfully alone
i loved it. at the troubadore, which is also my pet live venue. it was just great. he was so whimical and cute and furry. i got my ticket signed and bought some badges.

folk night at the globe

in which i developed an abiding love for 'the understudy' and 'ambitious lovers' - though the track i downloaded of the latter is ... not as cool as they were live. that's ok, because they are Local, and i will be able to see them soon-ish! jollification. i love the globe as well. the tilted floor means everyone can both sit and see - even lie down. the carpet is so lovely and rich, and the crowd there was great - as was the casiotone crowd. i think the venue helps everyone remain calm and sane. i love it when bands are more exciting live than on tape.

started at the Dendy

fun work! i make popcorn! and dip icecream into chocolate to make choctops. i also took advantage of my free movie and saw 49up. on a slight downside, i am finishing at midnight next monday. upside, i have money and can eat. it's a great job. the people are lovely, and the work is constant but not difficult. the people are lovely. its great.

books!

i have done some Investing at second-hand bookstores and have gotten some amazing books, spending No More than $37 dollars. i forget how much i love Lloyds. it's an amazing store run by an adorable, beautiful man. he knocks down the price on everything until he is practically giving the books away. i am currently reading mary daly's 'gyn/ecology' which, a few odd chapters through, is already blowing my mind.

sea silk shawl
i am knitting the kimono shawl from the pattern i got from mugwump, and i am Exceedingly pleased with the result so far. the way the sea silk falls is exquisite. i want to get some 100% silk next to make another shawl. i am thinking about designing some lace - i am getting the hang of how lace operates and how patterns work, and i look forward to integrating lace patterns into my art practice.

the lifted brow

looks like they are going to publish an article i am working on about my knitting community. !! yay! article for Meee!
i think that is all. happyweek

post drinking remorse

ug. i go through stages when i think that i might give up drinking forever. that would be cool, right? how strong and solid would i be, holding up sobriety like a medal of honour. i would be so independant... i have fun Soberly. i don't go for that drinking thing. i could have that Irritating air of superiority that people who refuse to drink do.

but, no. i have all these excellent intentions of protecting my liver and dignity, and blow it all when someone gives me a glass of wine. great. well done.

'breakfast on pluto' was great fun. it was such a sweet, magical film. maybe the main character didn't have a lot os sophisication, and the supporting characters are just props. but it has such an enchanting feel to it. as a Movie Person, i now need to develope a more critical eye when it comes to film. i am pretty unsophisticated with film in general to be honest, but i can Work on that, i am sure. this is in preperation for my new life as a dendy person as well as bookstore girl, and sorting out files woman. whoo.

what else. the forum on spirituality in the city was really interesting as well. the first speaker was sort of forgettable, while Luke Roberts was really great. and Father Bob! he wandered off on all sorts of tangents, kept to the point for about two seconds, and still managed to say more about the state of the city as a place for spirituality than the other two. i think he had a good point; people lock themselves away from the streets, and from the world. the lack of community. brisbane, however, has a little too much community. i like the idea of being anonymous in a huge seething mass. that was part of what was so wonderful about new york, and why i want to travel so much. i like dissapearing completely. and the internet! that is the wonder of the internet. my friends here don't know my whole world through distant contacts. (this, in case you didn't pick up on this, is an Anti-Brisbane week....) though randomly running into people is fun at times.

off to finish that article i was suppose to finish... er... a few hours ago.

on the internet. at a party

does it get more socially defective than that?? not really. i am waiting for free food to turn up, in front of me, as i just spent my last $5 on a beer. that is pitiful. and stupid. but, god, i thought it was free.

i am shmoooosing at the moment. badly. surrounded by writers and and artists and things. i got a Book Signed. yay for me! and i am drinking! yay for me also! there are many people from uni here, which is like a psudo-reunion-y thing. only they are people i vaguely know rather than actually know. admittedly, brisbane being brisbane, i have run into six people i know tonight. as you do.

i had an Adventure Yesturday. I travelled to the valley, met brad, saw a talk on spirituality in the city at soob. went down to new farm park, met jane, went to see a movie, 'breakfast on pluto', meaning to see band after movie and missed it, had cheap chinese food. this does classify as an adventure because i did a lot of walking, and i did things. go me! doing things!

now i have three jobs. job number three is at 8.30 in the morning... slighty unfortunate as i am Partying Hard, in a sitting on the internet sort of way. knitting while drunk is a poor idea, but i wouldnt mind going home and working on the Sea Silk Kimono shawl.
i am also planning a lace pattern for a spiderweb shawly thing at some time in the future... hmmmshawls. what is better than shawls? nothing! people, nothing! more shawls. MORE.

i am still having an adventure now though! drinking other people's cocktails while updating my blog. how hardcore is that?!
my feet are killing from my booties! they are large booties. i have boots. i have boots. i have boots and they are good. everyone here has better hair than i do. this is the story of my life. (tibbles does not agree with this statement) ...

tibbles (who is divinity humanised) is drinking beside me. we are making some new best friends. which is so fun, really.

should i get up and do some wanky dancing? i have done a bit already, and phoebe is upstairs, and, god, i love her! she is also divine! happy happy happy.

this is comforting me from the trauma from finding someone i shouldn't have looked for online... as you do? yes. as i do. chadd is wearing a joy division shirt, which i am admiring. god... drinking....

next tuesday is Casiotone for the Painfully Alone. i am soo soooo sooo excited. and wednesday is marlinchen, which i have to go to because jasmine is such a beautiful person... god she is nice! but, but Casiotone! i love him so much!!!! i cannot believe that, just a few months after developing the most intimate relationship with his music, that he is Touring. Jollification! oh Jollification!

oh bobby malone. it's good to have you home.


i hope the office is on tonight. i fear my sleep will be crapped up. god, i have to do dishes. the house is starting to smell.

freeeeeee

intermanet.

this makes me giddy with joy. resultingly, i am still awake at...er... 3.30AM taking full advantage of said free internet. i have an irrational fear that if i turn my computer off, it will go away. this is likely caused by the fact that it is 3.30am and the rational part of my brain has shut off.

the rational part is boring.

i start my new job at the dendy cinema in the next few weeks. i am plagued with the slight problem of the fact there is no public transport to the place where the cinema is at night. i am not totally sure what i will do about this. however, it is a job. that will mean i can eat. speaking of which, i had a Mandarine and Bread and Dip for dinner tonight. oh joy!
and i knitted with my sea silk. oh how good it is. oh how good. so crunchty and soft and sea and ... gooooood.

i watched a rambo movie. and cops. i am not totally sure why i did this.

i am SO OVER coughing. i am over mucus. i am over not being able to sleep from coughing.

my wallpaper is a skyline of NY. saving. saving. saving.

feeling. a little strange.

from muggy!




have spend all day online. spend the morning reading 'beauty and misogyny' by sheila jeffreys, and last night reading 'the whole woman' by germaine greer.
i am filled with Rightous Anger at the moment.

feeling a little. lonely? isolated? not that i don't have friends i could call, it's not that. something more. i don't know. some age old confusion about who i am or something. yes. probably. just alone. i am spending too much time on the pink couch. wandering around, random browsing people and such. nothing interesting.

i talked to a woman who was a seperatist in the 1980's. one of the most amazing conversations i have had with a stranger. what a facinating woman. right now, two mums and their little boy are sitting next to me in the cafe. their little boy is beautifully behaved, articulate, and both parents are engaging with him on a level that everyone is equal. it is the most beautiful family dynamic i have witnessed. it makes me sick that gay marriage is illegal. it makes me SICK that people call beautiful people like these perverted, or sinful, or innapropriate parents.

i don't wear heals. i only have boots. flat shoes. i like my feet functional and in tact. i won't destroy them in order to become lengthened or taut, or appropriate. i won't shave my legs or remove my rightful armpit hair. i had a stranger take a photograph of it once. he'd never seen a girl with armpit hair before.


today i was reminded why i stopped wearing makeup.

happy with presents.

yay! SP things! thank you so much Summer Fling Secret Pal! you rock!

in other news, i went to the movies and saw a great film, and read a book that was dissapointing.

i feel deeply frustrated by certain things. so i am gritting my teeth and eating tofu.

please let me get the job at the dendy. pretty please. pretty pretty please.


i also want to send out a huggle and a cheer to my darling wonkee woo
what beautiful squares!!!!!

however, she is naughty and has comments turned off so i just have to link and sing praises across the intermanet.

posties!

yay! cashmire! byron book! my life is complete. well. my ebay purchases are complete.

i love cookies. i have cookies.

happy squares

six done. countless to go.

boredom cure 101:

-volunteer work at art galleries.
-stop catching busses. start walking everywhere. 1. it kills time. 2. i get fit. 3. i save money.
-start fun and inane global art projects.
-fantasise about moving to NY
-DONT look for jobs online because it just makes me suicidal due to my uselessness
-fantasise about moving to NY some more
-think about who i would be if i were a character on neighbours
-look at yarn
-pet yarn
-halfheartedly knit a few things
-try not to think about bank balance and the fact i am not sure if i can afford next weeks visit to my shrink And eat. hm. which one should i pick. sanity, or eating. hm.
-contact friends you havent seen in awhile and play the ukeleli with them.
-pretend you can spell :)
-eat sugary food all day
-get free gin for lunch
-spend all day on the internet

-knit white squares.



veritas needs a goddamn motherfucking job.

it's been a long time...

since i attempted any sort of critical art writing.

i really am out of the habit. seriously. i feel lost. i have no idea where to start. and i still have no blu tack. i think i am going to spend tonight staring blankly at the screen, trying to remember words about art. and what they mean. and how to make them make sense.

on a completely different note, here is a picture.



bless your little cotton socks, monkee moo.

and, on yet another completely different note, i think a chunk of my sari silk in a glossy black is actually hair.
hrm.