before work joys

yes. upcomming christmas work expansion is mildly exciting. a few more hours here, a few more hours there...

i love the way my stickers are starting to rub off my keyboard. there is something beautiful about the way the gold is bleeding out of them. and the occasional loss of a waterdroplet.

drew has kindly contributed a computer flashcard programme to my attempt to learn japanese. it may or may not help.

the storm yesturday was so exciting. i was sitting at my Usual, an open coffeeshop in brunswick street, and then .... from a relatively cloud free sky it just hit. there was hail. we took refuge in the inny-bit of the shop.
in other coffeerelated news, i met the new owner of the shop. she seems really, really lovely, which is important. see, when one is working in a coffeeshop usuall, one becomes accustomed to getting coffee. so, on my bewick street days, it is almost essential that i have nearbye coffee of good quality. g. makes phenomenal coffee and when he is closed, m. and i have long, depressed rants about the state of coffee in the valley. the horrible coffee over the road made me feel upset, it was that foul.

gallery opening last night was fantastic. the art was incredible, the artists' lovely, and the crowd small. and, on walking home, me and the ladys i was with got The Best Possible hollar out of a car - 'it's a white 'destiny's child' with one extra' - can anyone make sense out of that? all i can think that it was a feeble attempt at a racial slur, given one of the girls is indigenous. it was far too stupid to even be offensive.

in other news, i am Biding time until Therapist is back from holidays, in order to rant about Famous Relative and my Newfound Anger in that direction. and i feel jittery as hell today.

g. gave me a lecture about the fact that i don't have to feel insecure, and inferior to everyone, that i have legitimacy as a human being on more than one level, that i have got talent, that i have got some sort of worth. he is very perceptive, because my verbosity seems to mute out the fact that i think very little of myself most of the time. but he was insistant that i stand up tall and stop slouching, and stop thinking i don't deserve anything. it's taken a long time for me to actually Do anything with my art, out of some feeling that i was standing on people's toes. but goddamn it. for once i just want to do something without thinking that i am not worth it.

on that note, i am going to do lots of drawings of the cat. i love buddy very much, and i have so many photos of him.

and knitttttting!